Many women will rationalize that their guy isn’t one of the do not date
guys because they like him and they want him to buck the trend. And of
course, it’s possible that a particular guy is actually a good guy even
if he exhibits some of these characteristics. However, most of the time,
“if it looks like a duck and walks like a duck, it’s usually a duck!”
Take a look at this list and really ask yourself if your guy is on it. And if he is, what do you want to do about it?
1. Mr. Serial Monogamist
This guy goes from relationship to relationship but never winds up
marrying anyone. He “seems” committed and ready to go the distance, but
he never does. My biggest concern with this guy is what will make you be
the woman who will get him to actually commit when he never has with
any of the others?
2. Mr. Comes On Too Fast Too Quickly
This guy met you yesterday and talks about moving in together today. You
had your second date with him on Tuesday and on Wednesday, he is
inviting you to family dinner. Of course, his interest feels wonderful,
after all, you are fabulous.
But, let’s call a spade a spade, he doesn’t even know you yet, so how can he actually know how fab you really are? Be wary.
3. Mr. Commitmentphobe
This guy is just scared of commitment period. He might have abandonment
issues which have made him scared to commit to anyone in fear they will
leave him. He will usually admit to you upfront that he has commitment
issues but he has worked on them and is “certain” he is ready to commit
this time around.
My concern with him is that 9 times out of 10, he is just a time suck of
your precious time when you could be finding another guy.
4. Mr. Bobber and Weaver
This guy is shady. He never answers your questions directly. His work
situation is shady, his divorce situation shady, his apartment situation
shady. He just bobs and weaves through answers. This guy is a
charlatan. Move on.
5. Mr. Excuse
This is the guy who breaks plans, behaves inappropriately and does
things to offend you and then always has an excuse as to why he did it.
Fine, give him a hall pass, once or twice but after awhile, you need to
face facts.
The facts are that his guy is an adult and he knows it’s wrong to hit on
your best friend, get drunk in front of your boss or tell you that you
need to lose weight when you are a size 6. Next!
6. Mr. Showers You With Presents
This guy is swarmy. Yes, gifts are nice, we all like them. However, what
are these gifts replacing or covering up? Are they buying your
forgiveness gifts? Are they keeping you hooked a little longer even
though he hasn’t proposed yet gifts? Or are you one of the lucky ones
who found a guy who is good to you and also gives gifts?
Just don’t be lured in by Chanel Bags and trips to Paris on a whim if that is all that is coming your way.
7. Mr. Been Around The Block
This guy has dated everyone you know and their mother, literally. Do you
really want to date everyone’s used laundry? And why does he play the
field so much? Is he insecure? Does he not want a real relationship?
Does he just like adding notches to his proverbial belt?
I don’t know the answers to these questions but if I were you, I wouldn’t want to stick around to find out.
8. Mr. Compares You To His Exes
This guy is not over his ex. If he is comparing you to her all the time,
then he still wants her. He may say he is over her, but he’s not.
Don’t rationalize that all men compare their present gals to their ex’s
because they do NOT. They might do it occasionally in their heads but
they certainly don’t do it out loud and they certainly don’t do it all
the time. Ask yourself: Do you feel like you will be his future or will
“she” be coming back?
9. Mr. Controlfreak
This guy has mommy issues and that makes him want to control everything,
including your life. You are an adult, don’t you want to make your own
decisions? Do you honestly want someone to tell you what to wear, what
to eat, where you can go and who you can spend time with? I doubt it. Do
you constantly want to be criticized?
This guy has a problem with everything and no matter what you do, it will never be good enough for him. Run!
10. Mr. Alcoholic
This guy is a drunk. He might tell you that he is a “social drinker” but
you know the difference. He might say everyone drinks as much as he
does. No. They. Do. Not. And when this guy gets drunk, which is often,
he gets mean and nasty. He will make you cry and feel like crap, a lot.
He is not a good look for you.
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